What does the word recovery really mean to someone like Michael Phelps?
The phenomenal Olympian’s legacy was called into question over the past 8 years after he was charged with substance abuse.
Photographed taking a hit from a bong
Handed two DUI’s
Sentenced to an 18 month probation
Suspended from Team USA Swimming and forced to miss world championships in Russia
Spent six weeks in an alcohol rehabilitation program
Girlfriend became his fiancée
Estranged relationship with his father improved
Peers elected him captain of Team USA
Developed reputation as a mentor at 2016 Olympics
Increased his Olympic medal collection to 26 (as of today)
Recovery is rewarding. But recovery is a hard word to swallow. A lot of people seem to believe the word brands them as addict, or alcoholic. Yet experts tell us that only the individual who has suffered from substance abuse can brand himself or state he is in recovery.
Michael Phelps rebranded Michael Phelps. The word recovery, in my opinion, should only be used in the context that Phelps recovered his career, his self-respect, respect of loved ones and peers, and most important, a rewarding relationship with his authentic self. His journey should be celebrated on multiple levels and bring a message of hope to families who struggle with loved ones who suffer from substance abuse. Congratulations, Michael Phelps. And thanks for showing those of us who want to recover our own self-image, that we can.
Age 18 is an adult whose rights and privacy are protected by law. Talk with other parents in a similar situation. Start treating him like an adult, setting boundaries between you and the substance abuser. Many parents don’t act until a problem is full blown, fueling the behaviors with excuses or multiple ‘second’ chances. An addiction therapist told me 75% of her clients “didn’t practice the tough love necessary to help their loved ones engage in recovery and responsible behaviors.”
Some boundaries for young adults:
Removing privileges, such as:
Young adults are resourceful. Parents with a drug or alcohol abusing teen or young adult should credit their children with the survival instinct and act swiftly to enforce a zero tolerance attitude with actions.
The blog, “Take Good Care of Yourself” http://www.tgcoy.com offers good insight into boundaries – what they are, who needs them, how to implement them. Here are some of the blog’s clear boundaries for a teen:
1. “Yes, I’ll be happy to drive you to the mall as soon as you’re finished with your chores.”
2. “You can borrow my CDs just as soon as you replace the one that you damaged.”
3. “If you put your dirty clothes in the hamper by 9:00 Saturday morning, I’ll be happy to wash them for you.”
4. “Can I give Joe a message? Our calling hours are from 9:00 a.m. until 9:00 p.m. I’ll let him know you called.”
5. “I’m sorry; that doesn’t work for me. I won’t be loaning you money until you have paid me what I loaned you previously.”
6. “You’re welcome to live here while you’re going to college as long as you follow our rules.”
Please visit these sites for more information on boundaries for teens